Most days I don’t think twice about being a single mom…heading out into the world to do the activities that are usually crawling with picture perfect families consisting of partners who are tackling parenting duties “together.” But from time to time I am out and about and something will catch me completely off guard and RIGHT IN THE FEELS.

Let me set the scene, it’s a beautiful fall day, a Sunday and unusually warm for late September. The streets of my hometown are bustling with locals and tourists a like, in and out of cafes, restaurants, and shops; probably taking a much needed break from apple and pumpkin picking at one of the dozens of local orchards. I am sitting in bumper to bumper traffic waiting to get through the Main St so that I can drop my daughter off to her Nona because I have to work tomorrow; a school holiday and she will be spending her day off with my mother and her cousins. I looked up for just a moment and I spot a man, I would guess to be in his early 40s carrying his son who must have been about 4 on his shoulders; where were they going? Who were they going to meet? What had they done today? Did that boy have sibling? Oh how nice it was to at one time have had someone to do things with on a Sunday, to have a “complete” family. BAM! And there I was, sitting at a red light, overwhelmed with emotion; trying to hold back the tears that were now rolling down my cheeks and fogging up my Rayban sunglasses.

In this very moment I felt lonely, different, and somehow less than. The most difficult part about being a single mom for me I think is the intense pressure of responsibility.

Somewhere the mom of that small boy was getting a break, even for a moment while dad took that walk with him on his shoulders, and I missed that. Every single day, it is all on me- providing, nurturing, caring for, disciplining- it feels as if there is no end. Being a single mom can be crushing, especially going into the holiday season.

I want to gently and lovingly say to all the single moms who are reading this and pouring another glass of wine because they relate- You are NOT alone.

Even if you have absolutely no help-YOU ARE NOT ALONE

My hope for you as it is for myself is that you get some rest, somehow. I hope that your children give you the extra love and hugs you need and that you find the strength to be the badass mom I know you are every day.

To the single mom who goes out into the world every day to give there kids a kickass childhood-I see you and I applaud you for your strength and your courage!

Cheers!